PBN Review: Mama Rock's Rules

When Parent Bloggers Network asked us to review Mama Rock's Rules: Ten Lessons for Raising a Household of Successful Children (Harper Collins) by Rose Rock with Valerie Graham, I couldn't wait to get my hands on it. I will be woman enough to admit that I stereotyped this book as: mom of a comedian means this MUST be a funny book about parenting.

While Mrs. Rock does use a sense of humor at times to make her point, I must humbly admit that this is no book of jokes but very real and direct advice from a mother who definitely knows the ropes. That’s right, Rose is a mama who not only survived raising twenty-seven children but raised them all to be successful as well.

If you’re anything like me, you are tired of the rows and rows of shiny happy rainbow type parenting books that are currently clogging up book store shelves. You know, the ones that tell you in one book that co-sleeping or time-out is a very bad thing and in the next one both are good for the child? Yes, some of them can be useful but one has to admit that parenting is a down and dirty job that needs blunt down and dirty advice.

Filled with common sense and loving determination, Rose Rock shares her ten major principles on raising children the no nonsense way. This book is divided into ten chapters of direct advice that focuses on everything from education and respect to responsibility and discipline. I love how she is able to just lay it all out there in an honest and straight-forward manner. A good way to think of this book is to imagine you are sitting on the couch talking to a good friend or mother figure and they are imparting some of their sage wisdom to you without any bull or sugar coating.

Rose reminds you that even though there are things about parenting and raising children we may not like, they are still necessary to raise them in a responsible and successful manner. Covering children of all ages, Mama Rock’s Rules is broken down into ten well-formatted lessons throughout ten chapters. In the book there are “Mama’s Mojo” blurbs and even a mini-lesson recap at the end of each chapter. I liked this because if you missed anything while reading the chapter, the recap would remind you that maybe you need to read it again.

When I read Mrs. Rock’s mantra, “I am the parent. You are the child. It’s my job to make the rules and your job to follow” I couldn't help but laugh. You see, that is a lesson I’ve been trying to impart to my own children from the very beginning. Unfortunately it hasn’t worked as well for me as it did her but I’m still trying!

Even if you don’t agree with everything in the book, it will definitely make you think about the way you parent. If nothing else I hope you take from this book a new sense of parenting power. Know that it’s okay not to give your child everything they want. If little Suzie doesn’t get an X-box 360 she really won’t die… honest. Giving kids a curfew really is a good idea, not something you just do to ruin their lives, and while it’s okay to be friendly towards your children it’s not okay to care more about being their friend than their parent. The fact that Rose Rock is a big advocate of praise and self-esteem reminded me that it’s okay to be stern with your children and at times even hard on them but do it with love and never use your power as a parent to tear down your child’s sense of self-worth.

It’s hard to pick just one chapter that I liked the most but “Don’t Lie Down With Anything You Don’t Want To Live With Forever” had me running to my seventeen year old’s room saying, “See! See! I told you all this and now it’s in a book”! Needless to say, he wasn’t too impressed with me right then. This chapter covers teaching your children to deal with sex and the fact that having sex with someone can alter the rest of your life so you damn well better think before you leap. This is something I’ve always tried to stress to my own teenagers so it was nice to know someone else thought the same way as I do.

Mama Rock’s Rules was a fun interesting book to read and well worth picking up. Rose Rock has all the good qualities that we as parents strive for with our own children- humor, pride, love, and a strong will making her an inspiration. When you get a chance, read Rose Rock’s interview on the Today Show and to read more opinions on this book visit Parent Bloggers Network. If you like what you see then get your own copy on Amazon.

Getting To Know You....

getting to knowwwww allll abouttttt youuuuuu. Sorry, couldn't help myself there. *smile*

I have decided that in order to get myself blogging regularly again that I am joining in on MommyFest 2008. The nice thing is that they have memes, prizes, and post ideas for me so all I have to do is type the post and they do all the hard work. YAY lazy me!!!

So the first thing I'm suppose to do is tell you a little about myself. Well if you want to learn ALOT about me then you are free to read my 100 Useless Facts About Moi. If you only want to know the non-gorey soso stuff then here goes...

~ I go by Jo but my full name is Jolene. Yes, my egg donor named me after that gawd awful Dolly Parton song. No, I don't like it when complete strangers sing it to me. Yes, I could possibly hurt you if you sing it anyway.

~ I have incurable cancer. Chemotherapy and radiation have no affect on it so we just play a waiting game until the tumors are big enough to operate on. Right now I have tumors in both sides of my neck, under both arms (armpits), in both lungs, and one in my right breast. I've already had several tumors removed from my neck and two from/with my adrenal glands. It's really not as awful as it sounds. At least I have time and that's more than so many others.

~ My oldest two children and myself have a rare disorder called MEN2a (multiple endocrine neoplasia type 2a). Basically it causes medullary thyroid cancer, adrenal tumors, and several other small noncancerous things. We caught the thyroid cancer early in the kids and they are now cured of it but mine had already spread so I can not be cured. I also lost my adrenal glands due to tumors and have to live on medication for the rest of my life.

~ I'm 6' tall and I really am a natural blonde. My natural haircolor is dirty blonde so of course there are times I will dye it a lighter color but all in all I'm a real blonde. Many people find that hard to believe because I have really dark brown eyebrows. No clue why and not much I can do about it. *laugh*

~ I had my first child when I was just barely 16 years old. I also got married for the first time at sixteen thanks to our families. We lasted two years and then the deadbeat became the scumbag that we all know and hate today. His name is Kirk Alexander Coiner by the way and he owes my son over $21,000 in back child support. He whines about how he can't pay it yet he can buy game systems, computer parts, pay for internet, go bass fishing quite often, and afford a truck sooooooooooooo.....

~ I love being a mom and I have three really great kids. My husband has been there for the oldest two for eight years now and I am so thankful. My two teenagers are so awesome and they give me very little trouble. Thanks to them the worst things I have to deal with are mouthiness, not doing chores, and my daughter being mad at me because I won't let her wear a bikini. Damn, life is good!

That's all I can think of right now. As I said, you can learn pretty much everything else about me by reading my 100 Things post. You are also more than welcome to ask me questions and visit my other blogs...

Homeschooling- Sona Creidhe Homeschooling

Medical/Cancer- Cancer Is The "Easy Part... It's Everything Else That's Killing Me!!

Reviews- LWH Reviews

Keep coming back throughout the week for more posts.

Hugz

Playing MeMe Catch-Up

I'm embarrassed to say that over the last few months I've been tagged for quite a few memes but with things as busy as they've been I haven't been able to post them. So this is the beginning of MeMe Catch-Up. Sit back and enjoy. *snort*

Alexandra over at Not A Day Goes By has tagged me a few times now so I will start with her. Also, if you've ever tagged me for a MeMe that I didn't do please feel free to email me and let me know. I forget things alot so it wasn't on purpose.

Rules are:

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.

2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.

3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.

4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

~ I'm afraid of deep water. Swimming in the ocean or deep end of the pool are not options for me. I freeze up for some reason even though I'm actually a fairly good swimmer.

~ I met my husband in an AOL chat room. We just celebrated our eight year anniversary on May 6th.

~ Even though I'm left-handed I write like a right-hander so anything I write ends up being straight up and down instead of slanted like other people's.

~ I have claustrophobia so badly that I actually run in and out of my closet because the small space bothers me. I absolutely can NOT go into a basement or attic because they bring on severe panic attacks.

~ I just found out tonight that I like Smirnoff Ice Wild Grape. It is sooooooooo yummy and so far it's not making me sick. Of course, I'm only able to drink one bottle of it and then stop but still... I'm lovin' it!! Tastes like grape soda. ;)

~ In the eight years my husband and I have been together I have never really decorated a house. I've never painted the walls, hung up pictures, or anything else. No clue why except that maybe I'm afraid we're just going to move again (which we did alot the first six years).

~ I'm a good faker in the fact that I tell everyone this cancer is no big deal and doesn't bother me when in reality I'm scared as hell because I know it's going to spread to my bones and I will die a painful fairly quick death and there is nothing no one can do. Sometimes I cry over it when Hubs and the kids aren't around.

I don't know how odd, different, or cool any of those were but that's what popped into my head so I typed it out. Hopefully you learned something new about me with this. I'm not going to tag anyone with this one because I know lots of people have done it. If you want to do this then let me know and I'll put a link to you in this post so people can read yours.

Thank you Alexandra for tagging me. It's nice to know I'm still remembered even though I can't post as much as I use to. *smile*

Tomorrow is Mother's Day so to all the mommies out there... HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Happy Anniversary Babe!!

Today is mine and Hubby's EIGHT year anniversary! Yay us!! It has been a very long hard eight years and I honestly never expected us to make it this far. Our relationship is probably one of the oddest ones I've ever known of. Hubs and I are sarcastic people by nature. In fact, I think it's ingrained into our DNA. I swear, neither one of us can go through a single day without some smartass comment to the other one. People who aren't use to us might think we are arguing or being mean but in truth we are having fun seeing who can come up with "a good one". Odd I know but it works. I think I would have gotten bored long ago if Hubs didn't verbally spar with me.

Anyway- he works graveyard shift and I had my first appointment with a new rheumatologist today so we really didn't get to celebrate but he gave me a perfect card and wrote about the same memories that I wrote in HIS card. *snort* I also wrote him a heartfelt letter but he won't get it until morning because I'm a perfectionist when it comes to stuff like that and had to rewrite it three times. *sigh*

I did get to buy him some jellybeans though does that count? Even though I'm suppose to be on a no sugar diet I celebrated the day with a nice big slice of chocolate cake from Mario's (an Italian restaurant in ABQ). It was Heaven wrapped in chocolate I tell ya!

You might be surprised to learn that Hubs and I met on AOL in a chatroom. We started out as just friends and after six months of talking on the phone we knew there was something more there. I think it took us so long because I had just gone through a divorce in 1999 that tore me up pretty badly and he was on the tail end of a divorce himself (my ex wasn't a bad guy just too much of a mama's boy and we were both selfish. Hub's ex was just a fucking psycho!). In the end it all worked out though and eight years later here we are.

I guess it's a good thing that Match.com wasn't around back then because we might have never found each other! We are so different we NEVER would have been matched up! haha!

So again, Happy Anniversary Babe and here's to the next eight years.

If You Cut Me Do I Not Bleed?

Okay so maybe that's not exactly the right way to describe the past month but I'll be damned if it isn't close! Yes, I've been a bad blogger again but I actually have a valid excuse this time. You see, I had surgery on April 15th to remove that lymph node in my neck that was pressing on my artery. That day things went well and I was in and out in no time at all. It's the almost two weeks AFTER the surgery that were pure unadulterated hell!!

I won't bore you with all the details but let's just say I got fucked over by a doctor AGAIN. Well actually a surgeon but who am I to squabble over something like that. *eyeroll* I ended up with a HUGE FUCKING ABSCESS in my neck where they took the lymph node out. The really fun part was that my surgeon looked at my ever swelling neck twice and still told me it was normal despite it being hot to the touch, hard, and growing like a whole other planet on the side of my neck.

The only way I even got proof that something wasn't right was by waking up at 3am on Big B's birthday to my pillow and entire left side of my neck covered in blood and pus (it's okay to say "eww" I did) with a gaping hole where the abscess had busted a few stitches to get out. Yeah, it was great lemme tell ya.

I ended up in Urgent Care where they did an X-ray, took a culture, cleaned the hole out, stuck half of a swab into my neck, packed the hole with gauze, covered half my neck with a gauze bandage, put me on antibiotics plus steroids (as if I needed more of those!), and then got to repeat the 80 mile round trip every day for four more days. Ugh, fuckin' bullshit!!

I am very thankful to Urgent Care though for taking such good care of me and the funny part was that the doctor that saw me the first day was the same one who saw MonkeyBoy when he had his MRSA! She walked into the room, looked at me like she knew me from somewhere, and I told her "Don't worry, I won't hate you and call you a mean doctor". She immediately knew who I was and said she still felt horrible about how traumatized he was. I told her that it was alright that he had actually told me to make sure I got "his" doctor because she would take care of me. LOL

There was a good part to all this though. I am now thankful for the extensive nerve damage in my neck (which is much much worse after this last surgery on the left side) because I couldn't feel any pain from the abscess, couldn't feel them poking or prodding the wound, and I haven't felt them repack it at all. So at least I've been saved some pain for once and that makes me happy.

On Thursday they began sending a nurse out to repack the wound for me because with the limited range of motion I have right now and the return of my vertigo I was deemed not safe to go plowing through society. Damn killjoys! *snicker* I'm very proud to say that over the weekend Big B was the one who packed the wound for me and he did such an awesome job! The nurse showed him how and that boy has been anal as hell about keeping things sterile while he's caring for my wound. Now if only I could get that to carry over to his room I'd be set. *wink*

The abscess is almost healed now and my neck is the size it's suppose to be again. When they did the surgery they cut me lower than they said they would so instead of under my jawline I have a new scar right across the left side of my neck. That bothers me but nothing I can do about it now. People already stare as it is so I guess one more scar doesn't much matter at this point. I just miss that tall beautiful blonde I use to be but I guess this is one way to teach my kids several lessons firsthand...

1- Don't stare at people just because they may look different. It hurts them just the same as if you called them a "freak".

2- Beauty really is only skin deep and no matter how much you alter or scar the outside there is still beauty inside.

3- Never count on looks to get you through life because they can be gone in the blink of an eye.

All this cancer crap has taught them to be more understanding and kind towards people so no matter what I know this is not all in vain. If me being carved up like a Thanksgiving turkey means my kids learn to respect other human beings no matter what they look like then it's worth it. I'll take this one for the team. *smile*